Friday the 13th - Part 3 (1982)

The Friday the 13^th franchise – up until it was taken over by New Line Cinema  - has a special place in my heart. It’s really hard to explain why, but I’ll sum it up by saying that the first film in the series was the very first horror film I was exposed to when I was seven years old. It was actually the very first entry in this blog I did about three years ago and you can find it here if you’re interested. You can probably say that I was “traumatized” by it seeing is that I saw pieces of it at a very young age and it wasn’t until I was a pre-teen that was able to see it in its entirety. It’s no wonder I’m so messed up. Maybe I can blame all those camping trips I was forced to take every summer and being in the exact surroundings as the ones shown in these movies. Maybe I can blame my father for thinking it was cute to sit me through most of it thinking it wouldn’t affect me [the whole story on that is documented in the very first LL80sH entry, as well]. Well, it did, and it did in a rather big way. I was never the same after that one summer day back in 1982 and since that time, I have slowly became a prisoner to the slasher film, to which I am now serving a life-sentence. 

My first encounter with part III (can anyone tell me why it’s labeled as “part 3” on the poster but registered and show in the trailer(s) and the actual film as “part III”?) was in 1983. My family was on a shopping trip to the Fresno Zody’s (Wow, I bet it’s been years since you’ve heard that chain mentioned) and located right next to it was a UA movie theater. I remember stepping off the car and looking up into the sky to see the yellow marquee emblazoned with huge red letters saying, “FRIDAY THE 13^TH – PART 3 in 3D”. I remember staring at it behind me as I walked into the store with my folks. That stayed with me. Months later, I came face to face with the poster at All That Video in Reedley – I don’t know why it scared me, but it did. The knife coming though the shower curtain with the knife coming through it – which, nothing of the sort was shown during the film. See below! – was an image I never forgot. (Speaking of: (slightly off-topic) I remember seeing a video poster for Part 2 in that same store that was comprised of only the head of Mrs. Voorhees. It scared the shit out of me then and I’ve never been able to locate it anywhere, even online. I wonder if I conjured that up in my own imagination?) 

My kid brother has an unhidden love for this one. Mainly because he has a soft spot (or better yet, a hard-on) for Dana Kimmel who was in Lone Wolf McQuade (one of his favorite films), but I know her as the little girl from Sweet Sixteen. But, before we get to her and the other actors, let’s start from el principio. This is not one of my favorite entries in the series. With every *gasp* out there I just heard, let me clarify by stating that I didn’t say I didn’t like the film, it’s just not one of my favorites -  which is funny because I’ve sat through this one a million times as the first three were the very first horror films I owned on videocassette as a teenager. Because of my “traumatizing” from the first film so young, I used to stand and hover over these at any/every video store we went to and there was a feeling of terror that would begin at the pinnacle of my scalp and travel rapidly down the back of my spine until it reached my toes. Especially when looking at the box art to this one. I can’t explain why, it just did.

 There is something about the atmospheres of parts 1 and 2 that still give me chills to this day. There’s a pronounced feeling of impending doom that I’m sorry to say the third installment lacks. Sure, it’s set on the usual clichéd “house in the middle of the country”-type setting, save for the campgrounds of the introductory two films, giving us a change in scenery of sorts to set up the Jason character in a deeper perspective. You can still feel the sadness of Part 2 in the opening flashback sequence, but once the camera looms down onto Jason with the machete stuck inside him and then we see him take it out, you can’t help but feel inclined to scoff loudly. I mean seriously, it just so happens Jason was strong enough and able to remove that big ‘ol machete from deep inside his shoulder?

 Now, let’s cut to the opening credits and that addicting disco song. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not chastising it in any way. In fact, I love that it oozes New Order’s “Blue Monday” – speaking in terms of the similarities in percussion, drum programming, and throbbing synth bass line – from all sides and love how eerily effective it really is. It was good enough to be a single and surprisingly, can still hold its own this many years later. Not for anything, but the theme on its own makes up the better part of the film.

 So we all know the movie’s premise and that Jason gets his trademark hockey mask in this installment and blah-blah-blah. That’s not what I’d really like to talk about because as horror fans – especially of this particular franchise – we know everything there is to know about them. We’ve done research, we’ve gone to and read information on website upon website, and we consider ourselves “pros” when it comes to trivia about these films. We know the running-scenarios: The group’s encounter with a Crazy Ralph-esque loon on their way to the campsite, the couple to have sex during the middle of the film get the worst death(s) (Jack and Marcie, Jeff and Sandra and now Debbie and Andy), the final girls’ boyfriend is always killed penultimately (Bill in part 1, Paul in part 2, and now Rick) and so on.  Some of the murder sequences in the film aren’t all that impressive, save Andy’s awesome torso-split-by-a-machete demise. Vera’s arrow-to-the-eye death was fantastic, also, but it loses a lot of clout due to the obvious wire that comes out from the gun as it hurls toward her. The others are cookie-cutter and unimaginative even with the whole 3D going on (Can you say “Rick’s obviously fake eye”?). And usually I wouldn’t complain about something like this, but if I see a girl taking a shower alone in a slasher film, I do expect to see her slashed to bits, especially if the one-sheet hanging in the theater suggests it.

 I wish that I could have seen this in its anaglyphic 3D version when it was first released. There is something about the standard “blue and red” 3D version on the deluxe edition DVD that just doesn’t do it for me. When it was first released, I sat down in front of a big-screen television and popped this in the player, slid on my 3D glasses and held my breath because I was finally going to see this the way it was meant to be seen. Or so I thought. Jason didn’t even get past Higgin’s Haven before I switched over to the original 2D version. I was disappointed, but at least it was available in 3D period.

 So why is it that I’m not awed by this one? I could sit here all night and point out every reason but we won’t go there. The ones that bug me the most though, are the so-called “backstory” between Chris and Jason. Her monologue to Rick as she recounts her nightmare encounter with Mr. Voorhees has got to be one of the most laughable in horror history. It’s so over-acted, it’s so inane and so unbelievable that you have no choice but to buy it. So was Jason following her? Is that why he showed up and recognized her enough to lift up his mask and make sure she knew who he was at the film’s finale? Was there more to their relationship than she led on? Because I’d like to know more about the alternate ending that was never used. You know, the one where Jason beheads her? I have this idea that Jason knew Chris more than she was willing to admit. That would explain why she is so terrified of him to the point of madness. But, this is only my opinion. They should have put the stills of this ending on the DVD so everyone could see it and make their own decision of which one could have/would have been better. Because this whole “let’s-copy-the-first-ending-but-replace-Jason-with-Mrs.-Voorhees-and-maybe-nobody-will-notice” ending really stinks, let’s be honest. To me, it felt like a cop out. As if the ending was thrown together because maybe the Chris-gets-her-head-chopped-off ending wasn’t going to work? Or would it have worked so well that the heads at Paramount didn’t want to risk it and order the generic re-tread of the first film’s scare the green light?

 Hands down, it isn’t the best in the series for me. But, it isn’t the worst either. That honor goes to parts V and Jason Takes Manhattan. I will admit that is has its moments worth looking at and it does have its charm in some spots. Keep in your collection for just the historical value and what this entry brought into the mainstream: a horror icon that forever has its place in pop culture and the lives of millions. 

The New York Ripper (1982)

I wish that I had the kind of memories of my first encounter with this film as I do the others that are on this blog. Usually I break into an immediate fondness and start recalling the many who-and-whatzits of where I was in life when I first held the video box to most of these titles because I like to share the manners in which I got to know some of these bad boys and girls. Now that I think back on all those mom-and-pop shops (and the not-so-mom-and-pops) I walked through during my teenage years, I don’t ever remember seeing this on any shelf – believe me, I’d remember that fantastic poster art! (I loved it so much it’s the banner of this blog!) Hmmm, why didn’t I ever see this one if I can recall boxes for Superstition and The Seven Doors of Death? I didn’t get into Italian sleaze cinema until the mid-to-late nineties, after I’d both discovered and then ridden the Suspiria train a few hundred-or-so times. By the time I did enough reading on this to go actually out and look for it, it was readily available on DVD so I apologize for not getting that warm-and-toasty feeling when I talk about The New York Ripper – though I honestly wish I could.

I started taking time to research titles and directors and slowly started to become more and more interested in films coming from that other end of the world. I wasn’t even aware at that time that horror films came out of any other country but the U.S. – as ridiculous as that sounds - and little did I know that a great deal of these films I was discovering would top most of the stuff I’d seen that was being home-brewed here. I came across this entry about two years after I’d already seen Lucio Fulci’s The Beyond and after reading about this particular one - and other films of his - on countless message boards over the internet and learning about its infamous reputation overseas, I couldn’t resist in tracking/picking up a copy of Blue Underground’s release at the local Rapsutin’s for under ten bucks just to see what the big deal was about. I won’t go into how it was one of the original (and more infamous) “Video Nasties” in Britain, how copies of it were famously escorted out of the country, and how it was banned outfight for many years, because if you’re a die-hard as I am, you already know everything there is to know about Lo Squartatore de New York.  I already knew who was in it before even sitting down to watch it: Andrea Occhipinti (A Blade In the Dark), Zora Kerova (who was in Cannibal Ferox) so with the experience I’ve had with horror films, I pretty much thought I had figured out how this was going to play out. If you’ve seen this (which you have – why else would you be reading this?), you know that I was completely wrong.

I won’t give away the details of the plot because somehow I have this pre-conceived notion that you’ve either already seen it or know enough about it to be interested in this post. And this is one of those films that I wouldn’t even think of giving away scene-by-scene because I want you, the reader, to be able to watch a film as this and form your own opinion (If you’ve read my review for “The Hazing” – you’ll note that I gave away the entire film, which actually caused someone who hadn’t seen it yet to send me a very nasty email). I do have to admit that I get such a laugh out of the film’s opening sequence and how it flawlessly breaks into a “CHiPS” kind of theme, musically. Many Italian-produced horror films (and their respective trailers) begin with (or shamelessly contain) this kind of cheesy disco-tinged track (Can you say, “Cannibal Ferox”, “The House on the Edge of the Park”?)

After a bizarre scene of a dog finding a random severed hand in a bush, we get introduced to the film’s premise: Someone in a [lousy] Donald Duck voice is killing people across New York City and the police force – complete with a closeted homosexual college psychoanalyst and a chief with a penchant for prostitutes - tries their best to solve the mystery. What ensues is nothing but trash and sleaze and still, after multiple viewings – as I’m doing now for purposes of this essay – manages to make me both cringe and howl in laughter, sometimes simultaneously. One of the film’s overall highlights, for me, is the photographing of the wonderfulness that is/was the old 42^nd Street, lovingly portrayed in gorgeous colors before the camera takes us to a live sex show and the extremely brutal murder of its actress by a broken bottle right-bloody-smack in the vajay-jay. I don’t think I’ve seen a murder executed anywhere else in horror history in that same manner. There is a cold darkness and feeling of hopelessness to the film that has to be experienced to be believed. This is no happy movie and that’s something I must stress. There is nothing redeemable about sitting through this piece of horror history. I sometimes try to figure out if the intention from the beginning was to prove a point by purposely making the film in an over-the-top fashion or if it just ended up that way once things were edited and put together. There are images so darky constructed that it does give a feeling of impending doom and for brief moments, we are watching a genuine horror film whose sole motive is to offend – and that it does. Then, just as one begins to get comfortable (or not so, depending on your taste), scenes such as the infamous “toe job” scene in the tavern interrupt and become perfect halfway-points between titillating and outright revolting but yet still manage to make me burst out loud in hysterics crying out, “What the f@#* was that?!”.

Conversely, there are moments such as the scene in the theater (the dream sequence) that are absolutely gorgeous. The poor girl alone having being chased by someone who just brutally attacked her and there is a deep helplessness in her eyes, as she looks around to see if he, the assaulter, can see her. Then, in a blinding light, she sees a familiar face and it suddenly slashes her with a razor point-blank. She screams over and over again until she wakes up only to find the familiar face [her boyfriend, Andrea Occhipinti] in the room with her. She slowly tells him her nightmare in detail, and then reveals to him that he was the one that assaulted her. That one scene is fantastic and probably my favorite scene in the entire film. Did I mention that I have a slight crush on Mr. Occhipinti?  His chiseled good looks, his brooding eyes, those amazing lips. Ever since my first viewing of A Blade in the Dark…and for the sake of this blog, I’ll stop there. 

One scene that drives me into fits of uncontrollable laughter is the scene when one of the detectives (the homosexual college psychoanalyst) is seen at a corner newsstand looking through porn magazines - gay porn magazines. I giggle because maybe I, myself, remember that part of the 80’s? It cracks me up how the cashier plays it off, stuffing an issue of Blueboy into a copy of the New York Times for him ever so discreetly. Suddenly, for a few brief moments, I’m a curious teenage boy again remembering…well, (pause) just remembering. The first time I watched this scene I admittedly had to rewind it and see it a few times on repeat. As I’m writing I wonder to myself if Mr. Fulci made this movie in the manner that he did to make a political statement or maybe, a disguised social commentary? Was he trying to make a point by being grossly misogynistic? The constant shots of New York’s seedy underground sex shops and neon lights (along with a theater marquee displaying a banner for Final Exam!) pave the way for scenes such as the slashing of the girl bound to the bed. The killer, as he caresses her body slowly with a razorblade, dancing along her skin as he laughs running it down her torso, opening her up and tearing her flesh apart. The slashing of her nipple and eyeball painted vividly and in such a grotesque and realistic fashion that you can’t help but scream as you’re watching.  On the imdb boards, someone even claims that this particular scene is cut and that it goes even further by having the girl get her crotch gruesomely slashed – which would make sense seeing that once the scene is over, the long shot once the cops are there shows her nether region mutilated.  

The climax of the film is fantastic, which I won’t give away and though it leaves the film overwhelmingly ambiguous, it’s still great. It’s one of those downbeat endings that leave you thinking, although you really don’t want to. It will leave you confused – as it is pretty far-fetched - and wanting more but yet in its own right it does the job. The final scene will leave you guessing but I’ll leave it at that.

In actuality, this film isn’t as graphic as it’s made out to be, but you do have to take into consideration the time in which it was released. For the 1980’s it was pretty brutal (the first murder in the car, that broken bottle to the vag, the sliced nipple and slice across the eyeball). Even by today’s standards some of the murders are pretty intense. The film does deliver a dank and putrid atmosphere but somehow doesn’t do it enough to drag you into its gaping jaws the way you’re expecting it to. Some of the sexuality in the film is more explicit than most were used to then (a toe job anyone? LOL!) and its tinged with enough sleaze and coarseness to fill a stew pot and feed a homeless shelter. That last sentence should tell you everything.

I really can’t say that this would be “essential” viewing, per se, but only because it’s one of the more notorious works by Mr. Fulci do I even recommend it. Just with its history and track record in Europe (and I believe, Australia) it’s one to look at, at least once. Fulci has plenty of hits and misses in his filmography but if you’re even the slightest bit curious, seek this one out. It’s available to rent via Netflix in both DVD form and instant streaming. Your jaw will drop and you’ll gasp out loud a few times without even knowing it. The rest of the time you’ll be laughing at the utterly ridiculous dialogue and at the ultra-random WTF moments scattered throughout – three fingered red herrings and all. I would , though, probably also recommend getting a warm bath (with a good antibacterial soap) ready just before pressing play on this evil little nasty, because with the filth and stench you’re going to have to endure, you will want to wash and scrub yourself down as hard as you can over and over again after you finish this!  

Hide and Go Shriek (1988)

The end of the eighties brought the downward spiral of the slasher film.

There were alot of factors that contributed to this: Maybe many of the low budget studios that were churning these out were finally seeing that their fruits were no longer profitable? Maybe there was a growing lack of un-interest in these types of films and studios didn't see the need to give out out hordes of cash to have less-than-Hollywood movie makers churn these out by the dozen? I have always wanted to know what really caused the fall of the slasher film by the time the greatest decade in history came to a close. But, if you paid any attention, some films were made at the end of this golden era that surpassed many of its predecessors in both style and content.

I'm walking through the isles of the H-E-B grocery store on Old Highway 83 in Weslaco, Texas. It's a hot Saturday during the summer of 1989 and I'm heading to the front of the store to where the videos were all lined up nicely in a attempt to get away from my parents for a while. The Dream Academy's "Life In A Northern Town" is playing above me on the muzak and I'm walking like I'm a big 'ol badass just because I'm sporting a pair of hand-me-down British Knights. You know what's even funnier? I can hear you, the reader, laughing to yourself as you read that last sentence. Not because you're laughing at me, but because you probably did the exact same thing back then. At any rate, this particular store introduced me to slasher favorites Sleepaway Camp, Terror Vision and The Last House on the Left. But the box on the left (in VHS form, mind you) brings back the fondest memories of that store.

I remember picking it up and being fascinated by the film's clever title. That's one thing that - sadly - I'm a sucker for. A clever title, a warning that the footage contained in the video you're distributing is "too shocking for theatrical release" and you've pretty much have got me sold. About a year or two later, this film disappeared off the shelf of this store and then, the store disappeared altogether in favor of a much larger store with a larger video rental area that was propped on the other side of the city. Sadly, I don't remember seeing this title again until 1999, when a Brownsville, Texas mom and pop video rental that still charged for memberships had this on its horror roster. One night, my then significant other and I were browsing the shelves and I picked this one up, eager for him to take it home for me. He instantly shot me down, stating that my love for eighties horror was "childish and unbecoming of me" and that was that: The movie was going to be left there on the shelf just as I'd found it. Not that it really mattered, but I had this feeling that I was never going to see this particular title in print ever again. And I didn't see it again, until 2006 when I snagged a copy up on ebay and finally added it to my collection. I 'oohed' and 'ahhed' when I finally held it in my hands again and unless you are like myself, a die hard slasher buff with fond memories of the days of the mom and pop video store, you wouldn't even to begin to understand my happiness as I popped it into the my third of six Videocassette Recorders that I own and sat back to watch. After years of waiting, this was the night.

Before I begin with the film's actual review, let me say that when you boast on your cover that you are similar to Friday the 13th and Halloween, you're really not setting your viewers up for much. Well, it's not fair that you're tell your viewers exactly what to expect. If you are a non-horror fan, or at least not a fan enough to seek out slasher obscurities such as this, you would pretty much, without even thinking about it, instantly classify the film as another run-of-the-mill slasher. I mean everyone has seen Friday the 13th and Halloween so why would your little film be any different than those two blockbusters and definers of the genre in those days? But I digress. The film opens up with a group of teens who have just graduated from high school and who are going to celebrate their new-found freedom in the annals of a furniture store belonging to the parents of John Robbins, the obvious jock and leader of the group. As they sneak in and the store closes, all hell begins to break loose as the kids are picked off one by one by an unseen killer. Seriously, this is pretty much Friday the 13th in a furniture store. But, don't dismiss the film just yet.

The film oozes eighties charm from the very beginning. The clothes, the hairstyles, the way the kids interact with each other - the music. It's wonderful in its own right and not to sound cheesy, but it reminds me of when I was a kid and when times were just much more simpler. While on the surface the film seems to appear just like the rest of them - which in reality, it is with a few exceptions - you've got to take the whole "furniture store" bit into consideration. Since this film, there has never been another horror film set in a furniture store so just for that, the film gets an instant twenty points. The (obvious) lackluster gore that could have made the film that much better is compensated with some genuine moments of suspense and terror that you don't find in many movies of that time period. The mood is sometimes very claustrophobic (the scene in the bathroom!!) and very tense in some parts and that's what makes this one stand out. If you just shut up and give the film a chance, you will end up liking it and wonder why it didn't have much more of a following back then. All the actors are "eye candy" (especially extreme hottie Sean Kanan) and they're presented to us as a group of honest kids who were just trying to have some fun and do nobody harm.

Now, ladies and gentlemen, let us discuss the film's extremely bizarre and even more unexpected plot twist:

Shit, even I didn't see that train wreck coming.

I won't give it away but I will go on record that this is one of the most bizarre and out-of-left-field endings I've ever seen. Four Words: Gay Romance Gone Bad. That's all I will say. I sat there with my mouth agape, jaw almost hitting the floor at the weirdness of how the whole plot took the exit off the highway and didn't bother to come back. It was about as strange as the ending of Sleepaway Camp minus the nudity, of course. As strange as this "revelation" is at the film's close, it gave the film a trademark of its own, which is something that 80's films were all about at one point: Who could give the audience something they'd never seen before and let me tell you, even I as a horror aficionado would have never expected what transpired during the last ten minutes. And for that bizarreness alone it gets two thumbs up. It's ends up being one of those slasher films that flew under the the radar during its theatrical run and got its audience on video. If you see this one lying around on VHS (as there hasn't been an official U.S. DVD release - and there may never be one), grab it and check it out. It's worth looking at once. The VHS claims to be "unrated" but I didn't see anything over the top that I hadn't seen in other films. But overall, the film is great in its own ways and at some points manages to top some of its competitors and counterparts of that time period.

Stage Fright (Deliria) (1987)

I don't care what anyone says, I love Italian giallo films and will defend them tooth and nail. I don't know why, but I will. Since the very first time I sat in front of a little film known as Suspiria, my taste for giallo only grown more and more and the years went by. There's just something about the way they are crafted, the way they are executed, and there's something about how bizarre and out of left field they can sometimes be. The Italian giallo holds no bars when it comes to gore and suspense and just on that factor alone, they can completely redeem themselves for the inane and generally strange story lines that they can sometimes present.

I heard of this film for the very first time through a friend who was also a horror collector. He was surprised that I'd never heard of it and told me that it was one of the best Italian horror films he would ever lay eyes on. Of course, I don't take confessions like that too seriously. I've been duped into watching what turns out to be celluloid shit just because someone recommended it to me. With my peaking curiosity of Italian films - at this particular time, I hadn't seen too many and wasn't educated as I am now - I decided to look this one up and see how it would match up with my tastes. When it comes to Italian horror cinema, I always give the film in question the benefit of the doubt and make my own decisions, trying hard to rely on the advice of anyone or the advice of anything I read on line.

I finally came across this film in DVD form about three years ago at a local mom and pop where I was living at the time and instantly wasted no time in picking it up and taking it home with me. I loved the cover artwork and when I read that Anchor Bay had released it, I knew instantly that this was going to be something I'd never forget. And boy was I right.

Young, nubile thespians are rehearsing a play about a owl-masked killer on the loose when one of the leading ladies hurts herself and has to be driven to the local hospital. But, the local hospital isn't your run-of-the-mill hospital, it's a mental hospital. A very prominent and famous killer is being held there and he escapes and hides in the girls' car. As they go back to the auditorium, he sneaks in, locks them all in and picks them off one by one. And what a ride! I don't usually gush about horror like this but this one is a total diamond amongst all the trash you and I have learned to watch and love. On it's own, it stands out. It's stylized, it's gritty, and it's downright gorgeous. I don't want to give much of the action away, not because I don't think it's worthy to be mentioned, but if you haven't seen this, please go out and look for it. There is a real style to the whole thing that Michele Soavi (the Dario Argento progote who would go on to direct Cemetery Man) impressively brings to the screen. Camera shots, panning, lighting, angles, it all works in this film. And don't get me started on the brilliance of the actors.

Usually in these types of films, the acting is either sub-par or just absent altogether. Sometimes it's so out there that it goes over your head. But the cast in this film bring about an honesty that can't be ignored. From David Brandon's performance as Peter, the director, to the most random performance by Italian horror-character-actor Giovanni Lombardo Radice - as a homosexual. Enough said. The atmosphere of the film is also pretty darn creepy and it works on a variety of levels. Everything is set up in a manner that it falls into place when it needs to, leaving no plot holes and leaving nothing unexplained. The film does contain some legitimate scares and some moments are enough to make you jump out of your seat. With it being sometimes cookie-cutter as far as the methods that the killer stalks the victims, there is a way that Soavi presents them that surpass most slasher moments. Once the killer finds his way into the building and locks the group inside, hiding the key, and once the director (and his promoter/producer) find out that one of their own has been murdered, everything is fair game. The lewdness of the two as they use the murder of a fellow crew member to capitalize on the play's potential success is a plot twist that ultimately backfires on them, but just the idea of it is pretty messed up. The director makes the work overtime, pushing them to their limits, telling them how much money they can make and how famous and popular they will be. But once they begin to disappear, the plans fall through.

I'm having a hard time trying not to give some of the best moments of the film away. This is one that should be sought out at all costs. The version I first viewed was the Anchor Bay uncut DVD which was later re-released by Blue Underground (which I own). Both versions are exactly the same, menus, disc and all. I also own the very-heavily edited U.S. VHS version released by Imperial Entertainment. I purchased the BU DVD for less than ten dollars so please do yourself the favor and go out and get this one. The film's haunting scene where the "final girl" has to re-count the victims who have been gorily placed on stage is one of the best ever. The film's final moment is a bit tacky and everyone has done it before, but I was able to look past it and this film instantly became one of my top favorites of all time. I can watch it again and again and never get tired of it - that's how great it is. You will have a great time being scared by this one. I guarantee it.

I apologize that I didn't go into detail much about this one. It's that good that I want everyone to go out and look for it and make up your own mind about it. Here is the trailer if you haven't seen it already - This is one of all time faves. and for good reason.

Kill Her! Kill Her!!!!!!!!

Body Count (Camping del Terrore) (1987)

In my book, I have a theory that a horror film can sometimes be summed up on its obscurity factor alone. Though I don't have many films on my list that actually prove that, I like to believe that it's fathomable. For example, my previous post for the ultra-obscure Last House on Dead End Street. Had never heard of it until a few years ago, never laid eyes on it until just the other night and though it didn't completely meet my expectations, it came pretty damn close. 

Body Count better known as the awesomely-alternately-titled Camping del Terrore

(Oh, come on, where have you heard of another horror film with a name that is cooler that that?), was one of those films that I'd heard about back in the day but never saw that it really existed. It was one of those that I'd heard about and read about but never really knew if it was a film that was actually in print, or one those that was mere hype. The reason I felt that way was because in all of my years as a horror aficionado, I had never seen, nor to this day have I seen, this film in print be it on VHS or DVD. So I did what every collector would do in this situation: Hit up Ebay. And of course, no luck. And if I did see it for sale, of course it went for silly money.

I posted a note on iMDB about this film and I got an email several weeks later from a fellow collector in the lovely state of New Jersey who told me that he would be happy to forward me a (legitimate) copy of the film to screen for this blog. Of course, I accepted and within about two week's time, I was sitting in front of my big screen television, popping this one in. I will forever hold the grudge against him that he didn't pass along a word of warning about this little ditty.

The plot is quite simple: A gang of college kids take a trip to the dark woods of Colorado during their Summer vacation to sort of "get away" from everything. While scouting the area, they run across a young hitchhiker named Ben who will lead them to his father's campsite out in the country. The place is located in the middle of nowhere and it appears at first glance to be the perfect place to spend the weekend. What these kids don't know is that the camp sort of has a "reputation" that involves an old local legend of a Shaman- half-man, half-beast. to believe, As they spent more time there they all realize one by one that the Shaman is indeed real and it's ready to kill them. Seems like a plot we can all relate to, right? Wow, I couldn't have been more wrong. If you know my taste in old-school horror, there is nothing I love more than to sit with some popcorn, a cold Pepsi and watch a stalk-and-slash film. As cookie-cutter as all stalk-and-slash films are (with the exception of a few hidden gems out there like Curtains and Maniac), I can easily overlook that minor flaw and give the film I'm screening the benefit of the doubt. But this one, sadly, was an exception to the rule.

First of all, the print I received was the darkest, murkiest thing I'd seen since Humongous, a film known for it's dark and almost completely unwatchable night footage. This was just as bad. Some of the death scenes occur at night and it was almost impossible to see what was going on. But that wasn't the most frustrating thing about this film. The pace is quite slow, the storyline wasn't able to keep my attention, but most of all: What a waste of David Hess! Every horror fan who has seen him in film like Last House on the Left or The House on the Edge of the Park knows and loves what this man can bring to a role. Forget Jason and Freddy, Krug was the man you loved to hate! There is brutal honesty when you put Hess in a role, especially as a villain. But to see him in one where he doesn't even play the bad guy? What the hell? I'm not used to seeing him as a passive father. But I digress. The only thing that was worse was knowing that this snoozer was directed by non-other than Cannibal Holocaust director Rugero Deotato who also helmed The House on the Edge of the Park. Let's not go there, shall we?

Long story short, the shaman does still exist (or does he?) and the kids get picked off one by one in bloody fashions blah-blah-blah. Usually in this genre of film there is always at least one thing that I can claim as a redeeming feature be it an actor who I can mark as the "eye candy" of the film (where in this case there was none), or a particular gore scene that caught my eye (where, also, in this case there was none). The only thing that came close was the film's final scene which left the view to decide if the shaman-beast in question really did exist. I can't go as far as to say that this is the worst slasher-in-the-words picture I've seen - that honor goes to The Prey - but it should have been a hell of a lot more than it was. For all the time I spent searching for this - no offense to Michael who was nice enough to send this film to me - there was absolutely no pay off. Unless you're a collector of Deodato's films or are a die-hard David Hess fan, there really is no point in seeking this one out solely on merit alone. As obscure and as hard to find as this film is, after seeing it, I've realized there's a reason...

Demons (1985)

During the horror boom of the 1980's, many film makers and producers tried to out-do each other by coming up with the most interesting and original concepts to present to the movie-going public. Because of this, there are many different sub-classes in the horror genre, ranging from the basic slasher, to the zombie epic, to the holiday-themed scare fest. All in all, the 80's produced some of the strangest, best, and worst films that to this day, cannot be matched.

This first time I heard of this film, it was 1985. I was running around in my parent's living room playing with my brother and the advert for this suddenly appears on the television screen. I instantly stop in my tracks and become glued to the set, unbeknown st to what was to follow. I can still remember it clearly, the scene with the helicopter, the scene with Rosemary in the bathroom, and the announcer's stern warning that no one under 17 will be admitted! I'd heard that warning before, but this time, it sounded real. There was a real tone in the announcer's voice that was pleading with me to heed the words coming through the television set. I stood there for a few seconds after the screen faded out to black. My heart was racing. Those mere 30 seconds had infiltrated my mind more than I would have ever imagined. It took a few days, but I got it out of my system and forgot about it.

That was, until 2002 when I rented this from a small mom and pop store in Knob Noster, Missouri one day and snuck it home to my sister's house. I put it on when everyone was finally down for the night and sat down with a couple of Pepsi's and a plate of barbecue chicken in front of me and proceeded, with caution, mind you. I remembered that TV commercial as the opening scene began and I'll be honest and say that I was a bit nervous. First I have to say that this ended up being one the most entertaining horror films I'd ever set eyes on. Sure, I was frightened and even shocked by some of the fantastic gore scenes, but I loved every second of it. The plot is one of the most simple and straight-forward in the Italian-Shock group: A mysterious man in a silver mask approaches a young girl named Cheryl (Natasha Hovey) and silently slips her a pass for the local movie theater, she convinces her best friend Kathy (Paola Cozzo) to ditch that day's classes and sneak off to the Metropol. Let me stop and say that the building that houses the Metropol is just phenomenal to look at and it was photographed in such a loving way that I'm surprised no one has written a book on just the theater itself. It stands hovering above the Berlin skyline and its blue neon letters are so beautifully painted across the face of the building that you have to pause the film and just marvel for a while at this piece of architecture. Inside, the white fluorescent-lights hum as the poster for Dario Argento's "Four Flies on Grey Velvet" hangs in the lobby (which was a hilarious tongue-in-cheek reference as he is the producer of this entry) while a silver demon mask dangles from a strategically placed (and very much random) motorcycle. In the group of patrons all there to see the film's premiere is a group of three street-savvy individuals: Ruth (Nicole Tessier), the rebel and free spirit Rosemary (Geretta Giancarlo), both led by the ultra-smooth talking Tony (Bobby Rhodes). Horse playing in the foyer, Rosemary picks up the mask and tries it on for shits and gigs and cuts her face in the process. Exasperated, Tony takes the girls and leads them into the theater.

A word on the inside of the theatre: If you've read my review of Nightmare, I mention how I imagined the grindhouses and theatres of Monterrey, Mexico would have maybe looked back in the 80's and the images of the inside of the Metropol gives life to those musings. The concrete floors, the wooden seats in rows of ten or twenty, the dirty and simple lavatories with cinder block as partitions, the dark corridors and stairways. It gives me chills just thinking about it.

As Cheryl and Kathy try to grab a quick snack from a non-functioning vending machine, they are approached by a pair of friends, George (the ultra-gorgeous Urbano Barberini) and Ken (Karl Zinny) who try to swoop in and woo the girls. The lights go down and the film begins, which, much to Kathy's vocal disapproval, ends up being a horror film about a group of kids who stumble upon the tomb of Nostrodamous. As this happens, Tony and his girls come walking in and sit toward the back of the theater, lighting cigarettes and causing trouble. As the movie continues and the boys try to put the move on the now-vulnerable girls, one of the guys on-screen finds a silver mask in the tomb much resembling both the one in the lobby and the one worn by the mysterious ticket-man (who, by the way is played by Argento protege and future Stage Fright director Michele Soavi). When the guy tries to scare the others, he, too, cuts his face on the mask, just as Rosemary had before. She immediately notices that her wound is still bleeding and excuses herself to the ladies room.

I don't want to give the entire plot away but all I will say is that as the guy on screen begins to turn into a demon, so does poor Rosemary. And when Ruth goes looking for her, the spreading of the evil begins. And so does the action! 


This film is so dated, it's almost laughable but, surprisingly, that's one of its charms. The decor, the set pieces, the soundtrack, the costumes, it all screams, no, it howls mid 1980's. The gore is amazing and it's no wonder this film is so held and cherished by horror fans all over the world. And when you really focus on the center core of the plot, that it's a horror film within a horror film and you imagine yourself in that scenario, it's quite terrifying. Take just one quick moment and close your eyes. Imagine yourself at your local movie theater and you're sitting with your boy/girlfriend and the most recent horror film is playing in front of you. Now, imagine that someone in the theater with you is actually possessed and you are trapped in the theater with no way out. How would you react? How would you really handle a situation like that? Imagine what you would hear, what you'd feel, and the thoughts that would be running through your mind. If you think about it long enough, it should run a chill up and down your spine. That's something that this film portrays, although in a very hyperbolic fashion, but it's something to think about. Imagine having to kill your own best friend because they were slowly becoming one of them? Imagine your past, everything you've been through, every moment you've ever shared and having to end their lives. It's pretty macabre, but hey, if there is one thing I've learned in this life is that anything can happen.

With that said, this film is a fun entry in the list of films from Italy and Europe. It seriously provided an entertaining look at a concept that has never been duplicated since. It is as original today as it was when it premiered and it still packs the horror punch the film makers wanted to present. Anchor Bay just re-released this on DVD and I've seen it for a really good price. I own the special edition double-bill set of Demons and Demons 2 released as an entry in the "Dario Argento Collection" series from AB and from what I hear, the set is now really hard to come by. It sill remains in my top 5 only because I can't resist a film that reeks of 80's like this one does. From the outright gorgeous camera shots of downtown Berlin to the fantastic make up, this is one you can't pass up. You'll thank me the first time Bobby Rhodes screams out, "What the hell happened to Rosemary?!" and you'll watch it again and again.


P.S. Did I mention that I'm completely head-over-heels for Urbano Barberini? 

My Bloody Valentine (1981)

In every horror fan's life, there are those select films that give us, to this day, those butterflies deep within. Butterflies like when you first meet that special boy or girl and you're trying to get them to notice you. Then there's that tingly feeling you get all over when he walks into the room. I mean, she. Sorry. There are those films that you end up, without expecting, having an unmistakable love affair with throughout the years and no matter what anyone says about said film, you stand by it as if it were the dreamy captain of the varsity football team. Wait, head cheerleader! Dammit!

This, for me, is that film. I can still remember that winter night in 1984 when I woke up one night with the urge to use the restroom. We had just moved onto a small humble ranch in Texas and we siblings all had to sleep in the same room. I noticed how late it was and I found it strange that the television in the living room was on. I walked in on my father watching a film showing on KGBT and suddenly, the image of a miner's mask came onto the screen. I was terrified, I crouched behind the couch and looked over at the television again and I saw the image of a man in a miner's outfit chasing a girl with a pick axe. Scared out of my mind, I remember quietly sneaking back to my room, getting into bed, and not being able to sleep the rest of the night. The image of the eyes behind that mask was something I never forgot.

Several years later, I was wandering though Weslaco's Valley Mart and browsing - again - through the horror section of the video rentals, I stumbled upon the box for this beloved ditty and my heart stopped out of pure fear at the sight of the miner's mask emblazoned across the front. It was something that had secretly invaded my dreams at night. That mask. That light. Yet I couldn't stop myself from picking the box up and meeting it face to face for the first time. There was something about the picture on the front that was captivating me slowly. There was a charm to the way Paramount was presenting this picture to me and I knew that I would fall victim to it someday. Unfortunately, that wasn't the day. Over the years, I'd see this on and off again at mom and pops and local grocery outlets and I'd always have fights within myself as to rent it or not. For reasons that I, at the time, would understand, I just felt that it would be best to just wait. One day, in 1999, fed up, I walked into the local H-E-B Video Central, picked this up off the shelf, and took it home. I popped it into the VCR and told myself that I had to face my fear and this image that had been haunting me for the past decade. This wasn't like Jason or Freddy, this was different. I turned off the phone, turned off all the lights and locked my front door. I didn't want to be bothered. This was going to be a sort of mind-cleansing for me and I had to be completely alone for it to work. When the film ended and the credits rolled, something wasn't right. I'd expected to be curled up in the fetal position in the corner of the living room, thumb in my mouth, calling out for my mother. I expected this whole thing to backfire in my face and leave me even more traumatized than before. To my own surprise, and without wanting, I had fallen in love with this little Canadian film and just like that, I became it's number one fan. For the next nine months, I rented this film every weekend. There was something about it that pulled me into its gaping jaws. And there was no turning back.

The plot is actually very simple: When several supervisors leave their post to attend the annual Valentine's Day dance, miner Harry Warden and several mining colleagues become trapped underground after an explosion. Being the only survivor, he is placed in a mental institution and escapes, coming back on the one-year anniversary of the accident to the small town of Valentine Bluffs to off some of the locals. Flash forward to the present where the local kids are planning a Valentine's Day Dance on the 20th anniversary of the disaster. When the sheriff of the town receives a box of candy, or what he thinks is a box of candy with an ominous warning, fear of Harry Warden's return fill the air. The news is passed on to the kids and the dance is cancelled. But do the kids listen? Of course not! So here comes Harry to get his revenge! But, look a little bit deeper at this beloved piece of horror history. There's a a lot more going on than you see on the surface.

This is one of those films that has a complete love/hate relationship among horror fans. Some, including yours truly, savor this each time we watch it and hold it close to our hearts. Others pass this off as a holiday-themed Friday The 13th knock-off. And why wouldn't they? I mean, the film clearly states at the beginning that the story takes place on Thursday, February 12th. You do the math. Coincidence? I don't think Paramount did that completely by accident. Some argue that the MPAA's slicing and dicing of the film back before its release hurt the overall potential and punch the film really could have had. And though I agree with that statement at some point, we all have to remember that it wasn't the film maker's fault that 9 minutes of the film had to be cut to avoid the cutthroat "X" rating. But you have to look at the story the film is trying to tell, the sub-plot of the complicated love triangle going on between T.J. (Paul Kelman), Sara (Lori Hallier), and Axel (Neil Affleck). Take a step back and take away the gore, the special effects, and the main villain and you get an honest, all-American (well, Canadian) love story between a grown man, the woman he left behind, and the new beau, who happens to be one of his dearest friends, that has taken his place. There is a frank maturity portrayed in this film between the cast that you don't see at all in slashers from this time period. From the story itself, to the people playing each part, to the reasons why the killer is motivated to terrorize the town. These folks aren't your run-of-the-mill group of horny teenagers at a campsite taking a summer vacation. These are mature, working-class adults who hold pretty blue collar jobs and the women who stand behind them. I think that's one of the things that grabbed me about this film: the honest portrayal of adults in a horror setting. You don't see any of them committing any of the horror cliches that you normally see and it presents itself as a strong, mature piece of film making. Sure, some of the scenes run slow, but they all have their purpose within the story. I think it was wise of director George Mihalka, for example, to have Sara explain her back story regarding T.J. and what pushed her to be with Axel. All of it ties itself together at the end.

The gore in this film is rather tame, but again, blame this one on the MPAA. This is one of those few films that received a massive chopping from the ratings board - along with Friday the 13th part 2 that same year - and its full version intact has been on the "holy grail" lists of horror collectors since the film was released. I've even been on one particular horror site where a guy devotes a huge article to the uncut footage, the "does it exist or not" theory, and his push for Paramount to finally release it altogether. Impressive, seeing that it's 9 minutes of missing footage we all want to see. When Paramount released this DVD for the first time back in 2002, lack of the film's original poster art and the piece of shit sleeve they put together made me totally pass on buying it. And I'm being dead serious. Then, to see absolutely no special features? Give us a break, Paramount! It wasn't until the re-release in 2006 with a new cover bearing the likes of Harry Warden that I finally decided to pick this up, again, sans special features. How hard is it to put the trailer on there for this one? I mean, I can go to YouTube and download it in the snap of a finger. So really, what was the big deal?

Luckily, Lionsgate heard our plea and bought the rights to the original film along with rights to remake it. They've just released a special edition DVD of this with all 9 minutes of lost footage put back in thanks to original producer John Dunning. As of this posting, I haven't picked it up only because I've been sick in bed with the flu. Though, in my opinion, I would have rather seen the proposed sequel, My Bloody Valentine 2: Return of the Miner instead of a remake, which, at the time of this posting, I've already seen it an advance 3D screening. In all fairness, I gave the updated film a chance and though Jensen Ackles makes my butter melt, the film wasn't good enough to say that it trumps the original as the definitive version. Sorry, Lionsgate, I'm just being honest. I am forever grateful, though, that you brought us, after many years of patient waiting, the restored uncut print of the film. I would have really loved to have seen Lionsgate release the original in its restored form as a double-billing with the 3D remake. That would have been something to marvel. So, the hunt for the complete version is film is over. We can all sit back, relax and enjoy this often-overlooked but much-beloved 80's slasher flick and breathe easy.

If you're reading this, you've either seen this several times and/or have this in your collection. I own the original Paramount VHS and the 2006 DVD re-release. I think I've seen this on a Paramount double-bill DVD with April Fool's Day for about $9 and just for this film itself it's worth the price. If you've never seen this, get it and watch it with an open mind. I think you'll find there's more than just an angry miner offing kids on Valentine's Day. One of my all-time top five, and for good reason.

Pieces (1982)

It is a warm summer day in Reedley, California. It is 1983 and my parents and I are at the local drive-in theater. Don't hold your breath, though. We're at a drive-in, but it's Saturday afternoon so we're at the drive-in-turned-flea-market on the corner of Alta and Manning Avenues. The day is hot and my mother, sister and I are in line in the concession building, taking in the cool air of the swamp coolers overhead and listening to 80's music over the loudspeakers, something along the lines of Air Supply or Hall and Oates or something in that style. My father is out in the heat trying to find something to buy, or browse, I can't remember which. I'm holding a Pepsi in my hand - ah, some things never change, do they? - and I'm chewing the wax rim off the paper cup and looking around at the movie posters behind the glass casings. Suddenly, this bright red poster catches my eye and has me frozen. The picture of a dead woman strewn on the floor with a large chainsaw hovering over her glares back at me with a force so strong that I can't stop staring at it. I can read the tag line at the top of the poster and the notice that "No one under 17 admitted to this performance" is screaming at me. I remember my mother calling my name to tell me we were going back outside but I couldn't move, my eyes were fixed on that image of the woman. She came to grab me and when her hand touched my shoulder, I remember jumping out of sheer fright. It was something I never forgot.

Several years while living in South Texas, I bumped into this one again while at Valley Mart - a grocery store in the city of Weslaco where I first came into contact with many horror classics - and listening to Kon Kan's "I Beg Your Pardon" as it came over the store's loudspeakers. I recognized the art that I'd seen on the poster and walked over to pick it up. This little wave of fear came over me and I held my breath as I read the back of the box. The premise? A crazed killer is stalking the girls of a local college in an attempt to mutilate them and create his own human puzzle. Sure, it sounded grisly, but it had my attention. With the voice of my mother calling me (again), I put the box down and walked away. Little did I know I wouldn't see this title again until my late twenties living in Independence, Missouri. I was in the local Best Buy and I saw the Diamond DVD release and snagged it without thinking. I ran home, put it in my player only to discover that the disc was a total dud. Man, was I pissed. I was pissed enough to where I didn't take the disc back - I'd only paid about $5 for it - and I didn't look for the film again. About a year or so later, I was shopping with some friends at the local pawn shop and rummaging through the used VHS, as I always do when I visit a pawn shop, I found the Vestron version of this movie and grabbed it. For only 50 cents, you'd better believe that I was walking out of the store with it. But I noticed that there was no label on the tape. No sort of sticker or anything. I wasn't going to fall for it twice so I asked the guy behind the counter to allow me to play it on one of their many VCRs and thankfully, the tape in the box was actually the film itself. I took it and as soon as I got home - and everyone went to bed - I popped this into the player and finally got to watch this one in its entirety.

The opening scene was completely laughable and nothing like what I was expecting. I laughed as I watched the kid put together the pieces of the porno puzzle and listened as his mother called him every name in the book when she catches him with it. What was even funnier was how the kid came back and hacked his mother over the head with axe to get her back. Blood spewing everywhere as the ax literally bounced off her head. A scene like that should have been terrifying and disturbing but it was just the opposite. I knew at that moment that I was in for a treat - especially when the telephone in the house rings and the camera shows us a push button phone. Doesn't the entire opening scene take place in 1942? Wait, there goes the phone again. Low Budget, is that you calling?

What transpires throughout the film is that there is a killer loose on the campus of a local college looking for female bodies to dismember to create his own human puzzle of sorts. We have the late, great Christopher George heading the whole thing and his lovely then-wife Linda Day going undercover as a professor at the college to get to the bottom of the murders. With the aide of the college dean (Edward Purdom) and cute student Kendall (Ian Sera), the four intend to get to them bottom of things. This film is fantastic. It reeks of sleaze and that's it's enduring quality. As a horror film alone, it stinks and not in the good way, but there are characteristics about it that still have it as the classic that it is, still showing in midnight runs throughout the country (I almost got to see it in Dallas, Texas during the fall of 2005 at the Angelika but, just as the time I almost got to see Cannibal Ferox...) and people still sell the show out. There is a sort of humorous touch to the whole thing and some of the scenes are so outrageous that you have to sit back and just laugh to yourself and wonder how the hell this crap fest got greenlit. I guess I can answer my own question on that one: back in the horror heydays of the 70's and 80's, if a particular film became an international smash hit, film distributors would cash in on that particular subject in their own ways to make money. When The Exorcist was released, how many possession films followed? Beyond the Door, Abby....I could go on. This was a film that cashed in on the success of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and they were brave enough to admit it on the film's adverts! Only this one gave everyone what they didn't get in that film: Blood and gore!

The Georges are great in this film. They play serious roles but play them in a manner in which they don't have to take themselves seriously. Wait, did that make sense? The best scene in the film is when the killer activates the campus' public address system and the sounds of a marching band blare across the schoolyard. No one can understand why this is happening and everyone tries to find out how it happened and how to shut it off. But when dear Mary Riggs (played by Day) reaches her tolerance limit and begins to scream the word, "Bastard!" at the top of her lungs in hopes of the killer hearing her over the already louder music, without wanting to, you just begin to laugh until you have tears in your eyes. Don't get me wrong, you feel her pain and understand her plight. But If you're a fan of this film, the moment you hear someone say the word, "bastard", you smile to yourself and see Mrs. Day-Greorge clutching her fists and screaming out into the open air. They don't make cheese like this anymore, kiddies.

The gore in this film is fantastic. It holds nothing back and it is what it is. Some of the murders in this film are so gruesome that you have to sit back and smile. They are presented with a loving detail that while you're smiling, you have to admire how these guys pulled them off in the first place. The acting is particularly sub par, but with a film of this nature, can you expect anything more than that? Toward the end of the film, it takes a bizarre twist that you're not expecting, which made the film all the more worth while. With the added treat of Ian Sera's full frontal shot - in front of a poster for Friday the 13th! - the film ended up being more than I would have ever expected, and then some. When the identity of the killer is revealed in the final act and when you realize what the whole thing is really about, you have to put your hand over your mouth and refrain from both laughing and screaming. But, I have to say, though, that the film's final shot remains one of the most disturbing in horror history - especially if you're of the male persuasion. You've got to admire and love a schlock film such as this that can make you laugh and then leave you with an uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach.

If you're a horror fan, get this one. I know that Grindhouse Releasing have just put out a newly mastered version of this film on DVD which I don't have yet. I think it's about time this gem got the proper DVD treatment as this one is really hard to find still in print. I own the Diamond DVD (though it doesn't work), the original Vestron VHS, and the VHS print on a DVD compilation called The Blood Feast Collection released by TGG Direct, grain, noise hiss and all. They'll never make them like this again. Enjoy them while you still can get a hold of them. This one is by far one of my favorites and it belongs in every horror fan's collection. Now that it's widely available, there's no reason why you shouldn't own it already.

I couldn't find a trailer, but here is the opening act of the film. Sleaze heaven if you ask me. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqhRvIiQ_zw for the original Spanish version and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLer508DxEk&feature=related for the English version. Notice the difference in the music and dialogue. Wait, did I hear someone say, "Bastard"?


(Update 5/25/12): I have to apologize for the review above. Since I wrote this a few years ago, my writing style(s) have changed and have "grown up" a little. I've been able to get my hands on the new 2-disc Special Edition by Grindhouse Releasing and let me say that it is the definitive version. The picture and sound are great (it can even be watched with the original Spanish-language soundtrack). One of the great special features on the second disc is an on camera interview with director Juan Piquer Simon, giving some insight on the filming of Pieces. But, the best feature of all - which was also done similarly on the Grindhouse Releasing version of Cannibal Ferox - is that you can watch the film with a track from a live audience watching it on the big screen at a Los Angeles theater. I did it only once and though it was oddly entertaining, it was something I will only do once. Then there's an on-camera interview with Eli Roth talking about the film and it's legacy and impact. The film comes with a fold-out replica of the original poster above and a picture of the original Spanish-language title, Mil Gritos Tiene La Noche. But honestly, I still love my Vestron Video VHS version, grain, hiss and all. If anyone knows how the Diamond version is (if it's cut, quality, etc), let me know, since I'll never know how it is; I've never seen it again in any store since I purchased my non-operational version back in 2003. I don't know how limited it is so get it before it goes out-of-print. It's worth having. 

Basket Case (1982)

As I mentioned in a previous post, some horror films are made in the attempt to outright shock the hell out of you. I love to see those old posters with warnings across them and unforgettable tag lines that stayed in your mind. I love to see the uniqueness of the poster art and the thinking behind some of those now-famous and collectible pieces. That's why I miss the horror trash of the eighties - it seemed that every B-horror film maker with the smallest of budgets was just out to see how low they could sink and how much they could gross you out. From horrific styles of murder and gore to stupid plot lines with deranged characters, 80's films hold their spots in history. Before they existed, there was nothing like them. And in today's modern world, there's nothing that could hold a torch to them. Whether it was to establish a reputation is to be argued by some, but Mr. Frank Henenlotter shocked the horror world when Basket Case was unleashed back in 1982. And I know if you're reading this, you're laughing to yourself because you've seen it and love it.

I first saw the VHS of this film at El Chaparral Supermarket in La Feria, Texas about mid 1986. I remember staring at the cover of Belial creeping out of the basket as it looked back at me and for weeks, I wouldn't pick the cover up. Every time I was in the store, I looked at the box but never held it. As stupid as that sounds, I must have been about 13 at the time, but one day I did and when I saw the horrific images on the back of the box, I remember throwing the box back onto the rental shelf, heart beating rapidly, and my imagination raced as to what kind of horror film this must be. I immediately vowed that I would never see it as something this horrifying would mess me up for life. And I held that promise to myself even seeing the box over and over again at various rental places and grocery stores as years went by. That is, until 2005, when the local mom and pop was easing out their VHS inventory to make room for DVD and this was on the seller's block for a measly $2.50. Hey, I was already in my thirties, right? How bad could this really be? I'd sat through atrocities like I Spit on Your Grave and The Last House on the Left, so this should be a piece of cake, right? Right...?

The plot is quite simple: Duane Bradley (Kevin Van Henteryck) makes a trip to New York and checks into the Hotel Broslin with a large basket in his hand. Being questioned by everyone wherever he goes, he keeps the contents of the basket secret and visits several doctors in the area. But there's a reason why he's visiting them. You see, Duane has a secret: In the basket, he carries around his twin brother Belial, who isn't really human per se, but a blob of skin and organs with no legs and two stout arms. They were separated by the evil Doctor Kutter (Diana Browne) and the boys have come to take their revenge on her and Doctor Needleman (Lloyd Pace) for separating them. The twins have a bond, a connection as all twins do, but since Belial cannot speak, he can communicate telepathically with his brother Duane and vice-versa. Belial spends most of his time quiet inside the basket, but when he finds out that Duane has found a love interest by means of the secretary at the doctor's office named Sharon (Terri Susan Smith), Belial wants out, and he'll do what it takes to break them apart.

Filled with humor and some of the sickest murders ever, this film is something you have to see to believe. The boys wreak havoc on those who cross their paths and Belial wastes no time in disposing of them, in rather ultra-violent ways. Some of the murders are so over the top, you wonder how people back them could stomach them. But what I love most are the scenes where Belial 'comes to life' in the form of stop-motion animation. That's right, stop-motion animation. It makes you laugh and creeps you out at the same time to see the little wad of skin and blood move around and it's something I can guarantee that you've never seen before and will never see again in a film of this nature. How this didn't get a slap on the wrist by the MPAA is pretty astounding. At least, I haven't read anywhere that this film was threatened with an X-rating. It should have, though. It pushes so many envelopes, and it pushes them off the table and onto the floor. Most of the film takes place within the Hotel Broslin, which provided the perfect sleazy setting for this kind of motion picture. It's dark, dingy, and you can smell it from a mile away. It reeks of the old days of 42nd Street - and there's even a scene where Duane is walking down the street in front those cheap and dirty theatres while being haggled by a fellow offering him every drug in the book. I always love to see scenes like those. One of the best scenes is is when Duane recalls the day him and Belial were separated. Totally cheap and totally fake, but you can't take your eyes off the screen. And the death of Doctor Kutter remains one of my all-time favorite murders and is one of the highlights you can't miss.

The pinnacle of the film is when Belial finally can take no more and escapes from his basket to roam around New York. Tired of being copped up and tired of living under his brother's thumb - and jealous of the woman Duane has found - he goes missing and the hunt is on to find the missing twin. Where he is finally found and what he is doing when they find him will actually have you saying out loud, "Oh, I think I threw up a little. (gagging noise)" It isn't pretty, kids, and it's something you don't expect. This turn of events causes the brothers to feud until they are hanging off the Hotel Broslin's sign hanging over the street below and end up on the pavement next to each other. 


Not to worry, Basket Case 2 was made several years later, so the story of the Bradley boys doesn't end here. If you're not already a fan of this film, you need to be. Thankfully, Something Weird released this on DVD a few years back and though it's not entirely cleaned up, it still looks damn good. The bonus material is great, especially some of the outtakes and alternate takes. They're worth looking at. Along with the two trailers, there's a radio spot or two. But you've got to take time and see the featurette, "In Search of the Hotel Broslin" in which Frank Henenlotter himself guides us through some of the many areas used during filming. Everything from the apartment building where the hotel stood to the building where the sign hung, to the S&M club that the bar scenes and basement scenes were shot in. And if you watch it, ignore the goof that's tagging around Henenlotter like a sick puppy, with nothing clever to say but emit a grunt here and there. Wait, he's a rapper? I rest my case. The SW DVD is marked unrated and I haven't seen the feature in its entirety to tell you how it compares to the Media VHS version that I also own.

Hands down, get this. I picked this up at Rasputin's new for less than $9. Even if you pay a little more than that, it's worth every penny. There is nothing like a bloody exploitation cheesy film to make a rainy day. And there's no film more bloody, exploitative and outright cheesy than this one. Shocking at times, hilarious at others, this belongs in your collection.

Here's one of the short (but sweet) trailers: